I never want to forget what it felt like when the devil made a visit to my soul.
I never want to forget what it felt like when he slowly tried to rob my thoughts and my sanity.
I never want to forget what it felt like to have the volume of my thoughts tuned up to the max that I felt my eyes flame up in fire and bleed out tears.
I never want to forget what it felt like to have my head crunched so tight that the bits and pieces of my brain were being vibrated through with electricity & flames.
I never want to forget what it felt like to actually feel the organ that is my heart wrapped around a barb wire and feeling every stab and ever drip of blood stream down my lungs.
I never want to forget what it felt like to never sleep.
He spoke to me of my past, of my fears, of my weaknesses.
He caressed me with his fiery fingers and told me, “Everything will be ok.”
He sat there by the window told me about my Jedo (Grandfather.)
He sat there by the window playing with my mind & soul like a rubric cube.
I refused to be solved.
I refuse to be solved by the devil.
I looked him straight in the eyes and smiled, “Tell me more.”
He smiled back and said, “Oh heart so pure. Eyes so wise. I shall fix you and everything will be ok. But believe in me.”
He continued, “ You hold a power stronger than most I know. I need you to believe in me. Together we will make everyone ok and I shall bring to your attention the power you hold.”
And in my heart laid strength so subtle, God given.
I smiled and asked, “ What brings you to me? I have not called on you?”
He replied, “ There lies a glow around you bright as the
suns light. It screams purity and love. It radiates positivity and strength.
Most importantly it is the most powerful one I have seen yet. I have entered
through the broken glass window and seek to fix you.”
I replied, “ How do you know of the broken glass window?”
“ You think you have repaired it, but you didn’t,”
“ And how can I repair it permanently? “
“ Only I can fix it because I can see your past and I can tell you who broke it and why.”
I stood there in awe wondering how can the devil seek to help me… and then all of a sudden appeared an angel, “be aware pure one. The devil shall never seek to help without something in return.”
I looked to my right and asked, “ He told me about my Jedo and described to me my past. He told me of my weaknesses and all that I hold dear in my heart but never told a soul. He must know how to fix me, I must be fixed.”
The angel looked at me with a beautiful heart felt smile and said, “ Oh heart so pure. Eyes so wise. God shall fix you. Call on him and you shall see, for once you do, the broken window shall be repaired permanently and no devil shall ever enter again.”
“Oh dear angel, why has the devil come to me? Why did you not protect me?”
“In order to receive we must seek,” Said the Angel and “But more so your broken glass window is what caused his entrance and nothing more. To repel him and his companions call on God for protection. Only he shall save you and only he shall fix you all the while asking nothing in return. For he alone is your protection, your guide and your only true healer.”
And so on God I called…